Day Twenty-Five.

I just realized that we are coming up on almost a month of being apart! Still a few days away, but wow! I actually feel a little more comfortable this evening, being home alone. I was pretty productive today and I'm tired at a reasonable hour for once. I would count this day up as a "win!"

I got out of the house for a short while today. I just had to run to the Post Office and send a document to my soldier. I decided to take the scenic route home afterward. I wasn't exactly sure where I was going, but I was pretty sure that it was the "back way" to get home. I figured, why not? I think it would be pretty difficult to get lost around here. The base is a lot more confusing than this little town! I filled my day with job searching and finding more information out for school, then put on a movie while I did some painting. I am working on some art, just for fun. I hope to have this piece done asap because I want to do a painting for our apartment before my soldier gets home as a surprise!!

The weapons meeting thing that my soldier had to do today after his shift was short, so he was able to call. He said it was basically a waste of time. They are going to the range tomorrow, and the class was about grouping and zeroing, which they have all done several times before. After the range tomorrow he'll be going to more driver's training.  He seemed to be a lot less tired today. I think he is starting to miss the little things from home because he mentioned that he looks forward to us making dinner together when he gets home, among other things.

There are so many "little" things that you miss when you spend long periods of time apart from your loved one, and especially in situations like this where the distance and circumstances are so great. For instance, having coffee together, being able to send a quick text to say 'I love you' or 'hey guess what I just did', sitting in the same room for hours and not having to talk, but just knowing they are there to smile at or give a quick kiss to, are all things that we often take for granted. Even being in the same house is something I miss! To know that he is only a room away would give me butterflies right now!

My only concern right now is that although the time is passing and the number of days until he is home is shrinking, I know that along with that comes the time when he'll have little to no internet access. I am not sure what to expect, and I don't like that feeling. I am glad that I'll be in school soon, albeit only one class, but it will still take up some time as well as the homework and driving, etc. I'll need that distraction when I'm left for days without any contact from abroad.

There are often moments when I feel so... present, I guess is how I would describe it. It feels like all of a sudden the world catches up to where I am...or maybe its me catching up to the rest of the world...and everything stops...time stands still, reality hits me square in the face, and then I can feel every second passing through my body.

Some might think of this as a good thing, experiencing life 'in the present.'
I would if it were a different situation, but having one of those moments today, I had to just close my eyes for a minute and take a deep breath, and then shake it off.

I don't want to feel every second right now. Do I want to make good use of my time? Yes. Do I want to enjoy each day the best that I can? Of course. But do I want to feel the sting of each second through my chest? Nope, I do not.

I'm not trying to wish time away, because I don't like to do that. Time is a gift for us to enjoy and make the most of it's moments. (Even when time seems like a slow torture, it's still a gift because we are alive, and most likely, better days are ahead if we look for them!)

I'll be happy when I can continue collecting more moments together with my soldier! <3

.....sending my love overseas tonight.... goodnight my soldier! I love you!